As a married woman who believes that God gave me His best when He gave me my husband, I’d be lying if I said that situations have never risen to challenge that belief. There have been those tough moments after a disagreement or after something didn’t go my way that I pondered very briefly if God’s choice was the right choice because of the way things “seemed”. And I’m willing to bet that I’m not the only one who can relate to these bouts of doubt, now am I?

First let’s deal with some semantics. The word “seem” means to give the impression or the sensation of being something or having a particular quality. A simple impression is not always based in truth and every sensation you feel is not always reliable. In other words, things aren’t always as they appear, looks can be deceiving, and feelings change like the wind. So major life decisions like ending a marriage should not be determined by such things. The mastermind behind the scenes is none other than our adversary, the devil. Satan wants nothing more than to kill your faith, steal your joy, and ultimately destroy your relationship through doubt and what “seems” to be the state of your marriage but isn’t. He is totally against marriage done God’s way (according to the Bible), which is why he’s always sticking his nose in married folks business to try and start confusion. If he doesn’t have anything concrete to use as an agitator, he will use you to get to your spouse or use your spouse to get to you. He will inject negative thoughts and suggestions into your mind about your spouse. I believe that is why many Christian marriages fail. One or both parties falls prey to satanic deception and ends up forfeiting the relationship God intended to be a blessing to them. Even if you weren’t in the center of God’s will when you married your spouse, if you love God he promises to work all things, even a perfectly imperfect marriage, together for your good. That’s the wonder of His grace.

The best advice I can give you if you find yourself questioning God’s best is to drive the doubt out! Doubt in a nutshell is a lack of faith and whatever is not of faith is sin according to the Word of God. Sin has this sneaky little way of not letting you enjoy the blessings of the Lord because it takes us out of fellowship with Him. Don’t let him do it. Remember, “the blessing of the Lord, it maketh rich, and he addeth no sorrow with it”. What the Lord gifts us with is supposed to add to and grow us as a person. Sometimes growth is uncomfortable, but it should never be painful or grievous to the point of misery. So if you are feeling sorrowful in your marriage, it ain’t God’s doing. Recognize your real enemy and his attack to pervert every God thing in your life, starting with your marriage.

This is not to say that there aren’t instances where the dissolution of a marriage is not warranted such as unresolved or unchecked abuse or infidelity. I am referring to those navigable molehills that seem like impassable mountains; those small foxes that destroy the vine of a loving relationship; those straws that if not dealt with properly end up breaking the camels back. Only you know what those things are in your house. If you recognize them today you can be more strategic in thwarting satan’s plan to use them against you tomorrow.