Tag Archive for Religion and Spirituality

Putting God First-A Practical Application

Phew!!! It’s been a minute since I last posted on this blog (two months to be exact.) I’ve been so busy with planning for our new radio talk show, writing my next book, serving in ministry and well, life in general, that I’ve been neglecting to post in this in-depth format. I’d be telling a half truth if I left it at being busy as my only reason for not posting. It’s also been because when I post I want to make sure that I’m posting something with substance and not just posting just to post. This topic has been on my heart lately, so hopefully the wait for new material will be worth it. Fingers crossed! 

Lots of people know Matthew 6:33 and can quote it verbatim. “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all things shall be added to you.” It’s a very powerful commandment and promise rolled into one, but what does it really look like when put into action by God’s children?

Seeking Him first is more than spending the first part of your day in prayer. It’s more than just going to church every Sunday. It’s more than being nice to people and being a part of a Christian based organization. All of those things are important and certainly have their place, but seeking the Kingdom first is a lot deeper and more challenging than that. It requires a commitment and dedication beyond what is natural and comfortable. It requires sacrifice. Take the parable of the rich man for instance.

This man came to Jesus wondering what more he could do to be saved. He was already keeping all ten commandments and had done so all his life. What else could the Lord require of him? Jesus told him something he had not been expecting–go and sell all of his possessions and come follow Him. The rich man’s heart was broken. He dropped his head at the thought of giving up what he had worked so hard for; the lavish lifestyle he was enjoying; the mark of his success and social status. And for what? To follow Him everywhere He went? The man walked away from Jesus that day because he wasn’t willing to sacrifice for the cause of Christ.

Sacrificing the things that are most valuable to us is putting God first. Jesus wasn’t as concerned about the riches the man had. He’s not requiring His children to live poor, beggarly lives by any means. He came so that we might have life and have it more abundantly. He was concerned, rather, about the condition of his heart. His heart was obviously set on the things he had because he was not willing to part with them, not even for the Lord.

Another example of putting God first is found in Luke 9:57-62 and involves our time. In this passage there are three individuals who speak to Jesus about following Him as His disciples. Two of them actually said, “Lord, I will follow you,” but there were conditions attached. Let me go bury my daddy first, one said. Let me go say goodbye to the folks at my house party first, said another. Jesus’ response was this…”no one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back [to the things behind] is fit for the kingdom of God” (AMP) The men had the best of intentions, but when it boiled down to it they were not willing to sacrifice the time they had allotted to other matters that were important to them, not even for the Lord.

But isn’t it important to maintain a certain level of wealth? To attend your own father’s funeral? To show hospitality to the people visiting your home?  Sure they are, but they are not more important than God and His call on your life. He wants to be our number one priority. That’s what true disciples do–they love others and they put God FIRST!

So practically speaking in this day and age, what does that look like? We can’t physically follow Jesus Christ himself anymore, so what can we do that is equivalent to this level of discipleship? Well, one of the thins it means for is being connected to a local body of believers (my church) and committing to the vision given to my pastor from God. It means giving of my resources (money, time, and talents). And it means making the support of ministry my priority. How? I take the needs of the ministry into consideration when I am making plans for how I spend my money and how I spend my time. I use my gifts and talents (writing, singing, working with children etc.) to help the ministry. If conflicts arise between what I want to do and what I’ve been called to do through ministry service (and they sometimes do), I make the tough decision to sacrifice my own desires. It’s not always easy to do, and I’ve grown to this place over time. But my life is so blessed because of it.

It also means seeking to obey His Word in spite of how I may feel about it, who doesn’t agree, or what my flesh is telling me to do contrary to it. I don’t always get it right, y’all and I have to repent often, but I do not practice sin. I choose God’s way over my own. I’ve had to apologize to and love people that I really did not like. I’ve had to abstain from fornication when my flesh wanted to give in. I’ve had to praise God through things I really did not understand. I’ve had to turn down worldly pleasures that other people said was okay to do. I’ve had to turn down opportunities that most people would have jumped on because I was already committed elsewhere. I’ve had to walk in integrity when it was easy to lie or cover my faults. All because I so wanted to please Him. That’s sacrifice. That’s putting God first. And again, my life is blessed because of it. Here’s Christ’s special promise to those who go the extra mile to follow Him.

“…there is no man that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, and the gospel’s, but he shall receive an hundredfold now in this time, houses, and brethren, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions and in the world to come eternal life.” (Mark 10:29-30 KJV)

This is an encouragement to you, not to drastically change everything you are doing, but to take inventory of your life and really see how you can give God a little more of your time to serve in your church; how you can give God a little more of your financial resources and tithe consistently. How you can take just one habit that you know is against God’s will and begin to break it with the help of the Lord. I don’t know about you, but I want and need “all these things” to be added to my life. Putting God first, not second or third, is the key.

In what other ways can believers put God first?

In Too Deep?

4369ec7c5ba1187e2997b8e07c28a0d4It’s been a long while since I last posted. Not because I haven’t wanted to or been thinking about it but because well…life just got in the way. Please forgive me. I couldn’t resist posting about this topic after a conversation I had with someone recently. She admitted that she found herself in a relationship that was no good for her spiritually and was beginning to see the consequences of it. Had she gone too far to turn back? Was she in too deep to get out? I think not. Here’s a word of encouragement to anyone who may believe that making the effort to walk in your deliverance is a lost cause. I pray that it blesses somebody.   

Are you in a situation that you know you need to come out of because it’s just no good for you, but you feel like you’re in too deep? Take heart, my friend. There is no situation too massive for God’s love to cover and no degree of sin greater than the measure of God’s grace.

He tells us about those pesky temptations and where we stand when it comes to them.

The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure. 1 Cor. 10:13 NLT

I get a couple of things out of this scripture that reveal God’ plan for those of us battling and by faith delivered from strongholds whatever they may be.

  1. You are not alone. There’s something comforting and yet sobering about knowing that the junk you’re dealing with is the same junk others are dealing with and have dealt with. Not to make light of your struggle, but keep this in mind. Your situation is not so rare that it doesn’t lend itself to a cure. Your problem isn’t so unique that it doesn’t lend itself to a solution. Not only are there others out there who can relate to your struggle, but there are people who can relate to it and reveal how they overcame it. Hearing someone else’s testimony can provide the motivation and encouragement you need to believe that you too can be free of anything that has held you captive. God is not a respecter of persons. If he can deliver one he can deliver all.
  2.  You are stronger than you realize. You may feel like you’re drowning in sin or so far out of God’s reach because of a few bad decisions you’ve made, but God already knew you were graced to overcome the very thing you think you can’t. No one else can strut through and out of the struggle quite like you can. Winning is in your spiritual DNA. You have the necessary equipment on the inside to denounce the demons trying to inhabit your life, to make a change for the better, and to finally realize the victory you’ve been given through Christ. Accept it.
  3. God has your exit strategy already in place. Your job is to find out what it is by seeking it out in His Word. Read about Jesus who was tempted in the wilderness and how he strategically escaped the devil’s temptations. He responded to every temptation with the Word of God that directly contradicted the devil’s lies. Even when satan used scripture to back up his lie, Jesus threw back another scripture against it. There’s no way around this truth…faith comes by hearing the Word of God. So if you desire to overcome, you must overcome by faith. The only way that you will have the faith needed is by hearing God’s Word concerning the temptation. Read it and receive the faith you need to succeed.

I’ll leave you with this. If you can have faith for God to save you and you believe that Christ died for you, was buried for three days, and was resurrected, you can have faith for Him to deliver you from daily sins/strongholds. Christ thought it was so important that He died for the cause–your cause. Your deliverance and victory is totally worth every step you take to walk deeply in it.  So deeply that no devil in Hell can draw you out.

The Pain of Discipline

discipline2I wasn’t ready, saints. I thought I had until my son at least turned one before having to deal with temper tantrums, but not so. One night while I was putting him down to sleep he got really fussy. I knew he wanted to nurse, but I didn’t give in to his demands because I knew he wasn’t hungry. Do you know what he did next? That adorable baby of mine threw his arms down with his little fists balled up and grunted loudly, frowning up his face at me. No he didn’t just give me attitude, I thought. A friend of mine joked, saying that the man inside him is standing up already. Well, I need that man to sit down–pronto! I’m sure you’re wondering how I handled that first surge of testosterone. I looked him straight in the eye with as stern a face as I could make and said “NO” with an even more stern tone of voice. I think he got the picture. The man inside him did actually sit down, at least for the moment, because his frown softened, he stopped grunting, and he went on to sleep.

That was my first encounter with disciplining my son, and it wasn’t so bad. Honestly though, I have mixed feelings about my son’s first spanking.

On one hand I’m looking forward to proving to the world and to myself that I’m no pushover when it comes to my child. I also want my son to know that like Homie the Clown, mommy don’t play that. But on the other hand, I am not looking forward to picking up a belt and making him cry. I don’t think any parent looks forward to it. But some people I know seem to spank with ease. Lord knows I will need help with this. The Lord who is my help, knowing just what I need has provided his Word as a source of instruction and comfort.

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

Before my son was born I was adamant about me being a better disciplinarian than my husband because of my teaching experience. But now that I see that adorable little face I have to pray for the strength to do what needs to be done on that blessed day when Gabe makes a poor decision (and he will) that warrants the rod of correction.  Lord, Jesus be a belt and a box of Kleenex for me afterwards. Nevertheless, no matter how undesirable discipline is to the giver and the receiver, it MUST be done. Here’s why.

Proverbs 22:15                                                                                                              Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.

AND

The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
I may not get many Amens on this one, but the Word is the Word. Our children are bound to do foolish things in life. That’s a part of growing up, but I REFUSE to be brought to shame as his m
other. Many parents make the mistake of trying to befriend their child, which makes parenting their child a catch 22. They worry that the child won’t like them if they correct them. I can understand that ” friend verses disciplidisciplinenarian” relationship as a school counselor. My role on my job is to be a student’s adult friend so to speak. I try to make them feel comfortable enough around me to tell me anything, and for the most part they do because I do not handle discipline in the way an administrator would. Because of that, I have to be really careful not to carry that same mentality home to my own child. I just love it that Gabe loves and even likes being around me, but at the end of the day I would rather he respect me.
In preparation for respect training camp here are a few discipline do’s that I hope to maintain.

Do keep my word. I will try my best to prove to my son that I am a woman of my word and that I follow through. Therefore, I will make every effort not to make promises that I cannot and have no intentions of keeping, particularly when disciplining him. For example, if he does something inappropriate, instead of giving idol threats that may tempt someone to call DSS (use your imagination here) or threatening to cancel the birthday party that I spent lots of time and energy planning, I will correct him with a punishment that is realistic and that fits the crime.

Do keep my cool. As much as my son’s behavior may have an impact on my mood at times, I will try my best not to discipline him when I am angry. That kind of goes back to keeping my word. If I say that I will send him to his room or spank him for doing something wrong, I need to do just that if he decides to continue the behavior before I allow my agitation to flare up. Letting him push the envelope over and over again only grinds my gears the more, and if I’m frustrated I probably won’t do much of the next discipline do, which is…

Do keep teaching. I will try to use discipline as an opportunity to teach, meaning that a spanking should be preceded by a conversation about the behavior and what would have been more acceptable. At times that conversation needs to be focused on what the Word of God says about the behavior. Showing him that obeying me is also obeying God may prove to be more impactful and hopefully encourage his relationship with the Father to deepen. To keep teaching I will also be intentional about modeling appropriate behavior in front of him. That means that the things I may normally do or say before thinking will need to be adjusted for his sake. I am not saying that I will pretend to be superhuman in front of my son, but I am saying that in my effort to practice responding better to upsetting stimuli, I may actually permanently change my reaction to upsetting stimuli. So he benefits by seeing a good example, and I benefit by improving my attitude. We both win!

I know that there will be lots more opportunities to train him as he ages, and I am determined to do it according to God’s standards. It may be hard at times, and I may have my mad-as-heck Madea moments; but I understand the awesome task to which God has called my husband and me. He has entrusted us with the great responsibility to care for, nurture, protect, and mold him through discipline and setting the right example. And we will do those things to set him up for success in this life.

I want to hear from all the parents reading this. What was it like for you when you had to discipline your child for the first time? What advice can you give me or any others who need help with this?